Acts of Service

While this love language may not be the most widely preferred language among the vast majority of people, there are a notable amount of individuals who feel that acts of service can be the most thoughtful and impactful methods of expression. For these people, small acts of kindness can bring about a sense of acknowledgement for the individual receiving the service, whether it is making your loved one breakfast before they wake up or folding their laundry after it comes out of the dryer. When it comes to acts of service as an effective love language, the impact of these small acts is less about the service itself and more about the thought that goes into the act. If your loved one is not a morning person and never has time to make themself breakfast before they rush out the door, making them breakfast before they wake up could set their day off to an unexpectedly pleasant start. If your loved one is constantly complaining about how much they hate folding laundry, taking the time out of your own day to fold their laundry for them would indicate that you listen to their concerns and hope to alleviate stressors for them in whatever ways you can. Helping your loved one up from the couch may feel as though it is meaningless and momentary, but if that loved one's primary love language is acts of service, your helping hand may stick with them as a positive reminder that you care. 

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Acts of service can be a love language that remains unacknowledged in relationships since it can be difficult for people to pinpoint what they are missing in order to really feel loved. Even if a loved one expresses their love often through verbal or physical mechanisms, sometimes those explicit means of expression don't register with someone who doesn't personally seek out those languages of love. It can be frustrating when a loved one's lack of assistance in the yard or reluctance to take out the trash feels like they don't care enough to help out, especially for someone whose relationships thrive off of acts of service. For this reason it is extremely important to not only know your own primary love language, but also the desired love languages of the people you care about.